Everyday people say to me, “I don’t know how you do it.” and sometimes I smile and say, “I don’t think about it I just do it.” and sometimes I ask for clarification. What are they referring to? Well, my husband and I have a 10 month old son. My husband has also been in Afghanistan since early this year. I wear many hats and take on many roles.
There are multiple tools that I use to keep me grounded in my faith and allow positivity to flow through me and our family as a unit, even though we are separated. Things haven’t always been a walk in the park, and with years of growing, learning, and tweaking I have learned how to handle hard times.
With that said here is my personal foundation for having the strength to pull through a deployment with a small child and keep our family functioning in full swing while we are 1,000′s of miles apart.
1. Gratitude. No matter what I am thankful for what I have. Things may get hard and stressful, but we as a family know that this is only a situation and in the big picture we are very blessed. As long as we focus on the good, the good keeps on coming.
2. Positivity. Do you remember my post about positivity in relationships? Those points continue to give me strength. I make a choice on a daily basis to stay positive. It is our lifestyle, but both my husband and I recommit every day through the challenges that are faced.
3. Communication. Strong communication has and will always continue to build my faith. My communication with God, my husband, my family, and my friends. Being able to clearly communicate will create a serene and good space energetically for me to continue thriving in.
4. Faith That Will Move Mountains. I refuse to let any situation that I am in shake my faith. When I move through a trial in my life I cling to my faith even stronger. When I know something tough is soon approaching I make a very concentrated effort on changing my mental tape. Let me share a story.
One week before my husband, Trevor deployed I began to cry at even the thought of getting in the car to drop him off. We were in the midst of packing up the house we started our life in, the house we brought our son home to and with every thought and every minute that passed my body was filling up with fear and pain of having to endure this period of time without him by my side. It was in that moment that I made the decision to make a change. I began to tell myself that we are living apart (and took the war aspect out of it.) After we said goodbye, as I drove away I said out loud “I am strong. The hardest part is over, the next monumental moment is being together again.” I repeated it over and over and over until I believed it. That mental tape changed and so did my situation.
You see, I’m no different than you. I go through the same trials and I face some of the same negative thoughts. At the end of the day what matters is how you handle the situation and how you handle the negative thoughts.
It is about taking the steps that are going to support you through the hard times, and it begins with learning how to handle what runs through your head 24/7. Your very first step is to read my short e-book, where I teach you how to stop the negativity in your life.